- How to Take Life Less Seriously? (01:20)
- How to Keep the Momentum? (04:07)
- What’s Important about Goal Setting? (08:19)
- Can you Become Good with Women only through Reading Books? Can You(10:38)
- Can You Get Good without a Mentor? (18:38)
- Is it Easier to Pick Up Women in a Well-Known Place? (Home City vs. Outwards) (22:43)
- How Do You Get the New Habits to Stick? (27:40)
- Where to Look for Women Outside of Night Clubs? (31:40)
Jonathan Van Matre’s 5 Principles:
1. How to Make Mastery Effortless.
2. How to Use Leverage Wisely.
3. How to Make Irrational but Pleasing Assumptions.
4. Polyamory is for Everyone.
5. How to Dwell in Mistery and Choose Love in Your Life.
“Personal charisma is a constellation of complex and sophisticated social and emotional skills. They allow charismatic individuals to affect and influence others at a deep emotional level, to communicate effectively with them, and to make strong interpersonal connections.
Here are the elements of personal charisma:
1) Emotional expressiveness. Charismatic individuals express their feelings spontaneously and genuinely. This allows them to affect the moods and emotions of others. We all know charismatic people who seem to “light up the room” when they enter. They typically express positive affect, but they can also stir us up when they are angry or irritated.
2) Emotional sensitivity. This is the ability to read others’ emotions, and allows the charismatic person to make an emotional connection by responding to their feelings. Just yesterday someone commented (for about the hundredth time) that Bill Clinton has a special ability to emotionally connect with people – to “make the person feel like he or she is the only person in the room.”
3) Emotional control. Truly charismatic individuals have the ability to control and regulate their emotional displays. They don’t “fly off the handle” (unless they purposely want to in order to make a point). They are good emotional actors, who can turn on the charm when they need to.
4) Social expressiveness. This is verbal communication skill and the ability to engage others in social interaction. Charismatic people are skilled and entertaining conversationalists. They certainly affect us with their emotional expressiveness, but there is also power in their words. Nearly all charismatic leaders are effective public speakers.
5) Social sensitivity. This is skill in reading and interpreting social situations, being able to listen to others, and be “in tune” with them. It helps charismatic persons to be tactful and sensitive to their surroundings.
6) Social control. Is a sophisticated social role-playing skill that is particularly important for charismatic leaders. It can be seen in the way that charismatic leaders (or everyday “charismatics”) carry themselves with poise and grace. It allows them to fit in with all sorts of people and make those emotional and social connections that distinguish charismatic individuals from those of us who possess less personal charisma.
While these are the 6 “building blocks” of personal charisma, and possessing more of each is generally better, it is also critical that people have balance among the various skills. For example, too much emotional expressiveness, without the ability to control and “turn it off,” can detract from personal charisma (think of a Robin Williams or Jim Carrey type).”
If you need more information on how to generate charisma, I recommend Magic Bullets by Savoy (particularly chapter 18: non-verbal communication, page 160).
Do you want more success with women in 2012? Then you need to check out these 7 simple tips to get the girl in 2012.
1. Meeting women isn’t just for Saturday nights
Bars and clubs are only a small part of the world. Branch out. Do some Day Game. Develop a social circle that generates attractive women for you to meet naturally. Build a lifestyle that puts beautiful women in your path. On the other hand, don’t try to be one person when you meet women and another person in the rest of your life. If you need to be more social, be more social every day. If you need to be a better storyteller, be a better storyteller every day. And so on.
2. Write down your goals and how you plan to get there
Studies show that people who write down and commit to their goals are over 600% more effective. And don’t forget to do a small step towards them every day.
3. Learn how to flirt over text/sms
If you date women who are under 40, you need to learn to text/sms. Texting should build attraction, increase sexual tension, qualify her, and let her get to know you better. In other words, everything we used to have to do in person. A phone number alone isn’t that valuable, but if you know how to use text conversations to get her dying to see you again – it’s money!
4. Schedule your priorities. Prioritize your schedule
Don’t leave what is important to you for if you have any time left at the end of the day/week/month/year/etc. Put what is important to you on your schedule and stick to it. That means some things will have to fall off. That’s okay. It’s much better to choose what you don’t have time for than to let what is urgent keep you away from what is important.
5. Get good wingmen
Good wingmen force each other to go out, make each other do their approaches, and encourage and help each other when they see something wrong. Good wingmen also let you have a lot more success. While you can definitely attract women when you go out alone it’s a lot better if you have a wingman to help you out. And more fun too!
6. Upgrade your fashion and hairstyle
Clothes and hairstyle say so much about you. To a woman, your clothes and hairstyle are a choice – and she wants to know what they say about you. Are you fashionable and cool? Or out of touch and lame? Are you fun and fresh and exciting? Or boring and afraid to be yourself? Do you respect yourself and have attention to detail? Or do just wear whatever? Make 2012 the year you get your “look” SOLVED if they’re not already.
7. Be man enough to get help
Most men aren’t good at this. Women don’t have this problem. They ask for and share advice all the time – and get much more personal than most men. This gives women a social advantage. Redress the balance in your own life – get some advice!