If you want to approach a woman you need to know what to say – you need an opener. You probably already know the “Hey guys, me and my buddy have a debate: Who lies more – men or women?” or “Is kissing cheating?” or “Do you floss before or after you brush?” -openers. So how about some fresh ones? Here is a list of new openers (by PUA_Swagger, Zeyn, Reef, Dallas, Gigantor, The MusicMan, Galego, Wadders, Silver Tongue, Themoose, Static, Tao, SmoothCriminal):
YOU: “You seem like you’re smart.”
HER: “Yes, I am.”
YOU: “OK, we’ll see how smart you are. I’m going to ask three questions and you have to answer as fast as you can, you game?”
YOU: “OK, do you own a refrigerator?”
YOU: “What’s the most common color refrigerator ever made?”
YOU: “What do cows drink?
YOU: “Nooooooo! Wrong, I don’t know if we could hang out.”
YOU: “I have to get back to my friends in a minute, but I need a female opinion on something.”
HER: “What’s that?”
YOU: “My ten-year-old brother Mike just texted me, and apparently there’s this girl in his class named Stephanie that he has a huge crush on, but he isn’t sure how to express it to her. If you were ten years old again, how would you want a boy to show you that he likes you?”
HER: “Well I think that _________.”
YOU: That makes sense. I’ll let him know he should try that.”
YOU: “Let me buy you and your friends a drink.”
(Roll up to the bar and get however many corresponding shots of water so it looks like vodka or tequila. Then bring the shots and announce a toast as they wait for me to roll out the scene thinking they just made a sucker out of me. I wait for the response after they shoot the water and walk off. I wait for them to talk shit to build value and establish me as different and then proceed to re-open the set.)
YOU: “Hi, [insert time constraint]. On a scale from one to ten, how good of an age to get married is nineteen?”
HER: “Zero, or five.”
YOU: “So, you agree with me that it’s a bad choice! That’s what I tell my little [sister/cousin/niece] but she won’t listen.”
HER: “It’s an eight, or nine.”
YOU: “But not a ten so you would hesitate.”
YOU: “Hesitation is bad news, that’s why I tell my little [sister/cousin/niece] that it’s a bad choice but she won’t listen.”
HER: “Ten! It’s great!”
YOU: “I knew you looked like trouble, I’ll never introduce you to my little (sister/cousin/niece).”
YOU: “Just curious, do you wear the color red a lot? The reason I’m asking is because I read this thing on the Internet about the psychology of color, and how the colors you wear project a certain aspect of your personality to the world. You wearing red means you’re an energetic person, full of excitement. Too much red can overwhelm people, but with just enough, there have been studies done that people surrounded by red feel their hearts beating faster and feel out of breath in a good way. ”
[while using a fake or invisible microphone]
YOU: “How does it feel to be invited here tonight?” (have the frame of asking red carpet like questions)
YOU: “Say something to all your adoring fans out there?”
[get close to her and be serious for a moment, after laughing is usually a good time]
YOU: “Did you hear about that car crash that happened at [insert place]?”
HER: “No! What happened?”
YOU: “Well there were two cars…one went this way [cross your right hand to be kinda by her right cheek]. And one went this way [cross my left hand to be kinda by her left cheek]. And then they collided [light tap to both cheeks]!”
YOU: “Out of curiosity, I have to ask—what exactly are you drinking?”
HER: “I’m drinking ______.”
YOU: “Well, the reason I’m asking is because I was just talking with my friend and he was telling me all about how you can tell a lot about a person based on what they drink at Starbucks [or just say any coffee shop]. He seemed really excited about it, and I just had to see if it was true.”
HER: “Haha, oh really? Well what’s a _______ mean?”
>From here just go to a bunch of basic personality types often commenting on her energy (for espresso), sense of calm (tea), sensitivity (chocolate drink), or likes to be pampered/needs time to warm up to people (frappuccino).
YOU: “Hey guys quick question. OK, so it’s almost summer and of course every girl is trying to get a bikini perfect body. And you always see a bunch of girls spending hours and hours on treadmills… say, if you guys work-out, would you ever consider doing weights? I’ll tell you why I am asking in a second. I mean, are you guys the cardio-only girl or the also do weights girl?” (Let them talk amongst themselves and when they answer…I high five the girls that do weights, and tease the girls that only run on treadmills.)
[Note: depending on the time of the year, summer would be “So, it’s summer”, after summer would be “I know summer passed, but of course every girl is still interested in getting a bikini perfect body.”]
YOU: “Hey I really like your ring. You could totally kick someone’s ass with that. I will call you if I ever get into a fight.”
YOU: “Hey X, I want to get your take on something real quick [insert time constraint]. If an average looking guy approached you on the
street or in a bar and had food in his teeth or his fly open, would you let him know?”
YOU: “Interesting answers, but that’s not my real question. My real question is if the same thing happened but the guy was really attractive, would it make a difference? [be sure to add root of why you’re asking here]”
YOU: “Excuse me, I want your advice for a moment [provide time constraint here] while my friend is at the bar [gesture to wingman at the bar]. We’re only here for a week on business and were wondering where the better places to go are? I’m only asking you because you are better dressed than anyone else in here.”
WINGMAN to YOU: “I can’t leave you alone for 2 minutes can I?”
YOU: “No I was just asking these, girls where’s a good place to go round here, but they haven’t got me convinced that they know.” [give playful smile to let them know you are only teasing]
YOU: “On a scale from 1 to 10, what’s the meaning of life?”
A lot of people want to know how to create attraction. So, without further chit-chat, here are the 3 sure-fire ways to create attraction:
1. Be mysterious.
Being mysterious means that you simply don’t reveal everything about yourself. Why is this good? Because the woman generates all sorts of possibilities of what you could be. She equals you with ideas (often fantasies) that she has in her mind.
It’s obvious: when we think there is nothing else to decipher, that all the clues were revealed and that the mystery is solved, we lose interest.
It’s what we don’t know that keeps us fascinated. This is even more important during the initial stages of attraction.
Here is an example of a conversation that generates mystery:
Her – “So what do you do for a living?”
You – “You might be surprised if I told you, but before that, what do you do for work?”
Her – “I do promotional stuff.”
You – “Really? How’s that?”
Her – “Good. I like it.”
You – “I suppose you must have a lot of good stories about the people you deal with.”
Her – “Well, yes, there are some weird people.”
Me – “Of course. You remind me of my friend Kay, who has done promotional work too. One time she was doing a promotion… ” (Launch into an interesting DHV (Demonstration of Higher Value) story).
Instead of answering her question you change the conversation to her favorite topic (herself). Then, launch into an interesting story that communicates your personality and attractiveness, while still not revealing too many personal details about yourself.
The secret is that she has a good time with you in the moment. Then later, when she feels attraction, she will use her imagination to fill in all the blanks.
2. Surpass her expectations.
By dedicating a lot of time to living and arming yourself with life experiences, the people who meet you will be taken aback by finding out more about you.
They will be pleasantly shocked by how interesting and accomplished you are, and a new type of mystery will develop as they question what else lies beneath your surface.
Here’s the same conversation, but this time with focus on developing the second type of mystery:
Her – “So what do you do for a living?”
You – “You might be surprised if I told you. What would you think somebody like me works in?”
Her – “I don’t know…”
You – “Aw, c’mon, what do you mean you don’t know. You must have some idea.”
Her – “Well, I don’t know…I would say you are a student or that you are working with a company.”
You – “Not quite, I’m a skydiving instructor.”
Her – “Wow! Really? I would never have thought.”
You – “Why not?”
Her – “I don’t know…it’s just that you didn’t give the impression of being like that…”
You – “Things aren’t always the way you think.”
Some of you might be saying, “But I don’t skydive… I don’t even do anything that resembles that!”
If this is so, maybe it’s time to add some adventure and new experiences to your life.
Ask yourself, “What is one thing I’ve always wanted to try, but have never gotten around to?”
Will you make plans to try it? It might be a lot of hard work, but you CAN do it.
Jealousy is a sneaky emotion. Thoughts of inadequacy and insecurity race through the mind. Knots form as fear and anxiety creep into the stomach. While these feelings are easily identified as negative, when wielded properly in a pickup they can yield shockingly positive results.
The secret to harness this invisible power lies in the commonly held belief that women are bynature driven less by logic and more by their emotions. Even if they meet a great guy, and intellectually recognize that he is cool, interesting, funny, and various other great things, this is by no means a guarantee she will pursue him sexually. She will only do that when her emotions tell her to.
Here’s how you create a jealousy plot line:
You’ve made your approach and opened the group for conversation. You’ve won over her friends and demonstrated to her that you’re different from the other guys. Sure you’ve told a few bad jokes but you’ve also had a few good ones and everyone laughed at them. She is clearly enjoying your company.
The night progresses and the two of you talk more. You find out about her dreams, desires, and passions. There is some light touching between you, but nothing major. She seems reserved to move things forward; you’re being slotted in the friend zone. Already having exchanged contact information, you mention you have to get back to your friends and bid her farewell for now.
She thinks little of it until in her peripheral vision she sees you sitting with the girl in the red dress. “Who does she think she is?” she wonders. “Giggling at his jokes and flipping her hair back like that.” Suddenly she feels the knot forming in her stomach. Her emotions are warning her she may be losing something she desires. And thus the switch has been flipped. Her emotions do not lie: She desires you.
You return with a smile to discuss one of the open loops left in your conversation from earlier. She is thrilled to have you back. A new energy exists behind the interaction. Now, when you touch her, your touch is reciprocated. Your escalation is welcomed and desired. Now, she is even laughing at your bad jokes. It’s on. Your plot line was played to perfection.
For more great tips on how to create attraction get Magic Bullets, the bible of attraction.
Every approach begins with an opener, the springboard to start a conversation. This early moment sets the tone for the interaction and breaks the ice.
Any bullet-proof opener will help you achieve three goals:
1. It’s an un-threatening approach to open the person or group up for having a conversation
2. It stirs up curiosity and captures the person or group’s imagination
3. It’s a springboard for additional follow-up conversational threads
What Makes an Opener “bullet-proof”?
There a few ingredients that allow you to approach smoothly without seeming awkward and give you a built-in “safety net” to eject if necessary. Here are the ingredients:
1. ROOT – The first question that runs through anyone’s mind who is approached by a stranger is this:
“Why is this guy talking to me? What does he want?”
The root in an opener communicates from the beginning WHY you are talking to the person. It explains the reason of your approach.
2. TIME CONSTRAINT – The second question that crosses the mind of anyone who is approached:
“How long do I have to talk to this guy? When will he leave again?”
(She obviously doesn’t know yet how interesting you really are :)) By embedding a time constraint in your opener, you will answer this question from the beginning. A time constraint looks like this:
“I have only a minute. I’m already late for a meeting.” It also has a second advantage. If you
need to eject, you can, say at any time: “I have to run. Pleasure meeting you.”
3. OPEN-ENDED Question. If you ask a Yes/No question it will be a VERY short conversation. Posing questions that elicit a longer response will give you more opportunities to start another conversational thread and more time to think.
Here’s an example of a bullet-proof opinion opener:
You: Hey guys, let me get your opinion on something. I’m trying to help my friend and I’d like to get a female opinion. (This is the root explaining why you are asking the question)
Group of Girls: What?
You: Okay, I’ve only got a minute. Do you follow the advice given to you by your horoscopes? I have a reason for asking. Let me just get your opinions then I’ll tell you why I’m asking.
(There’s the time constraint and the open ended question)
Group of Girls: …
(Sometimes this will already start a conversation. But there is more. The second part of this opener transitions into a little story)
You: The reason I’m asking is because my friend met a girl at a party last weekend, who said that her horoscope told her that she would meet her future husband. They actually hooked up. Now, the strange thing is, ever since then, my friend can’t stop thinking of her. He always wants to hang out with this girl, 24/7. He says he’s in love with her. Do you think it’s the horoscope’s prediction or just psychology?
Group of Girls: …
(This will lead to conversations about astrology, destiny and a lot of other topics.)
Keep in mind: A good opener is NOT just about the words you say but about HOW you communicate in these 4 levels:
Level 1: The words that you say.
Level 2: The vocal intonation you use.
Level 3: The type of eye contact, facial expression, gestures, and body language you display.
Level 4: The attitude you are feeling, and the energy you are projecting.
What does that mean?
It means just because you know the WORDS, does not mean you can USE the opener. It comes down to PRACTICE and REPETITION.
You will find tons of great (working) openers in the book Magic Bullets. Get it! It will change your life (no exaggeration!).
Many people find themselves having trouble communicating over the loud, repetitive sounds of the night club. If you’re not used to the noise it can be hard to think, let alone communicate!
This exercise is an easy way for any guy and his wing to overcome the deafening noise of the nightclub.
Level 1: Get Comfortable in the Noise
First you’ll need a stereo that can really blast some music (the stereo in your car will work for
the Level 1 exercise.) Put on something loud, anything from bumping club music to grinding
death metal will do. Blast the music. Stand about 10 ft away from a friend and simply talk about anything for 5 to 10 minutes.
Get comfortable with thinking and speaking over loud music. It doesn’t matter at this point if the other person understands what you are saying. What matters is that you can keep on track and tell a story all the way through, over the music.
Repeat this exercise 4 times over the course of a week and you will find yourself to be much more comfortable around loud music.
Level 2: Storytelling and Listening
Write up, find, or memorize a story that your partner has never heard before. Stand across from each other and crank the music up. One of you will be the storyteller and the other will be the listener. The storyteller will try to communicate his story over the blasting music. The listener will try to figure out what the story is all about.
Once the storyteller is finished telling his tale, turn the music down. Now, the listener will
explain what he believes the story was all about. If his version of the story is way off, then the storyteller needs to change how he expresses his story.
The storyteller and listener should discuss ways that you could use your body language and
tonality to more accurately tell the story. Use your hands, make gestures, or change your facial expressions to match feelings or events in the story. Emphasize specific words that are important to the meaning of the story. Find parts of the story where you can throw in some kino. Tell the story again. Then change roles.
There are two lessons for this exercise. The first lesson is how to communicate an entire story to a group of people in a loud night club so that the listeners get the point.
The second lesson is how to listen to and interpret a story in a loud environment. This is especially important when a girl is telling you a story. The more you can hear, the better your response could be.
One of the worst things you can do in a noisy club is to “peck” when you can’t hear what someone is saying. When you can’t hear someone, most guys will lean in closer to the speaker.
Some men even think this is a positive form of kino because they can use the noise as an excuse to get close to the lady. However, by repeatedly leaning in, you resemble a ravenous chicken, pecking at feed in the chicken coop. It looks bad and it conveys lower value.
Resist the urge to peck. If you can’t hear what someone says, stand tall and simply ask them to repeat it. Do not lean forward. For more tips take a look at Magic Bullets (there are also FREE chapters!)
P.S. Happy New 2011!
There are a lot of dating myths out in the world that are false. Here’s Savoy’s Top 3 List:
1. Women want a nice guy.
You have heard and seen this plenty of times; Women saying they all want to date a nice guy, but then they all end up dating the jerk or bad boy. This paradox is as old as the Earth.
Women do want someone who can be nice to them, but also someone who can push their buttons and has strong boundaries. Nice guy lack the latter and that is why especially beautiful women don’t end up dating the nice guy. If you are one of the nice guys, try to tease girls more and fooling around with them. It sounds counterintuitive, but it works.
2. Dating should be fair.
This is a big one. It goes like this: “I shouldn’t be doing all the pursuing and all the work, dating should be fair”. If you recognize yourself, stop right now.
In the dating world, the guy has to be proactive about it. Just accept this. You can’t expect for women to approach you and seduce you. When one does, it’s most likely a pro (not a professional!).
You can also look at it differently. You have the option to pick the women you want to date. You are the one exercising the freedom of picking. Women don’t. They have to go through a lot of chumps and unfortunately sometimes they still can’t find the right guy.
3. Women hate to be approached.
There is this myth out there that says women hate to be approached. Nothing couldn’t be further from the truth. Why do you think it takes hours for women to get ready to go out at night? If friends want to have a conversation over a glass of wine, they can do that at home too.
Another popular excuse women use is so they can “dance.” Another excuse to masquerade why women really go out. The real reason women go out is to find a guy, just like you go out to find a girl. Don’t let these excuses women give fool you. The next time you see women out, keep in mind that they want to be approached and swept away. You can be that guy.
One of the reasons this myth is so established is because a lot of guys have no clue how to approach women and they do it in a terrible fashion. For example, using a pickup line does not work and it is the fastest way to get rejected. Instead, with the right fashion, body language, and the right thing to say you can start enjoying conversations with beautiful women. All those topics are covered in the pickup bible “Magic Bullets”.
Relationship management is a crucial topic to improve your long-term success with women – unless all you want out of your relationships with women is drama and one night stands.
Relationship management encompasses everything you do after you sleep with someone, but, like many phases earlier in the model, your success is dependent on the groundwork you’d laid earlier. Just as what you did in comfort influences your chances in seduction, what you did in qualification, comfort, and seduction influence what will be possible in relationship management.
And a lot is possible. Anything from a long-term committed relationship to dating multiple women to friends with benefits; it’s all possible if you have the skills and know what to do. Much of what is regarded today as obvious was once highly controversial before I came along. For example:
-You literally never have to lie to get what you want, even if you want to date more than one woman at a time.
-99% of all relationships fall into six major categories. Which pattern your relationship falls into determines where you can go with it.
-Relationship management begins before you even sleep with her the first time.
You have many relationships in your life. You have a professional relationship with your boss, you have a fraternal relationship with your brother, and you probably have a dating or a “friends with benefits” relationship with at least one woman in your life.
So, when we talk about relationships and relationship management, we are assuming that you and a woman are boyfriend-girlfriend. Relationship management refers to the frame in which you and a woman are interacting.
Relationship management begins well before you sleep with her, but most of the important work comes after. Commonly, men only start thinking about relationship management after sex is over: “I slept with her; what do I do now?” It’s a rookie mistake to leave it so long, because a little bit of work to set the frame during comfort goes a long way afterward. But we’ll cover this later.
For now, let’s start by looking at some of the basic relationship types:
Traditional: One boy, one girl, no one dates anyone else.
Traditional Plus: Like traditional, but sometimes you involve other people in your sex life (not your emotional life). Usually this is when both you and her enjoy threesomes with other women.
Open: Your primary emotional commitment is to each other, but you are both free to date other people. Open relationships vary in intensity: some are much like Traditional Plus relationships while others are far more casual.
Multiple: You have a strong commitment to each other, but nothing theoretically limits what you can do with others.
Dating / Undefined: The rules of what you’re doing and where you’re going are unclear, but there is no explicit commitment. Often early in your relationship and usually the case before you sleep together.
Friends with Benefits: No significant emotional commitment. Relationship is primarily sexual.
As you can probably see, these relationship types are ranked in decreasing order of commitment. Drilling down, we see that there are pretty clear distinctions between the types, in which you are #1 to each other, the middle two, in which this may be more ambiguous, and the lower two, in which there should be no expectations at all. For simplicity’s sake, we will call these three groups High Commitment, Medium Commitment, and Low Commitment.
What you seek is a matter of preference. There is nothing inherently superior about one relationship goal over another. It depends on your desires, her desires, where you are in your life, and all kinds of other factors.
That being said, many of you are going to skip straight to the Multiple Relationships section. That’s fine if that’s what you truly want. But pause for a second and truly consider things. Don’t just want something because it feels socially impressive or some of the top Pickup Artists in the world want it. It’s a lot more work than it seems. Many of the top names in the “Seduction Community” have never pulled this off successfully, despite their marketing propaganda.
Whatever your relationship goals, there are some key points to keep in mind:
The type of relationship you have with a woman can and usually will change over time. In general, it’s easiest to move within a given Commitment level (from “Multiple” to “Open” Relationship or from “Dating/Undefined” to “Friends with Benefits” for example). Moving between Commitment levels is much harder. You can sometimes move up, but rarely down. Moving down usually requires a breakup first, and a period of no relationship. After that, you can try to re-establish a relationship, but often all you will be able to get is Friends with Benefits. This happens between ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends more than many people think.
While you can get away with trying to move to your desired relationship type after you’ve already had sex with her, this compromises your effectiveness in a couple of ways. For one thing, if she gets the sense that you don’t have much of an idea about what it is that you want, this could turn her off and you’ll never get to sex in the first place. In addition, you will be far more effective at bringing her to your desired relationship type if you are able to implicitly set the right expectations in advance. It’s not like she won’t think about it just because you’re not giving her anything to go on. She’ll think about it anyway, and she’ll let her conclusions be driven by her own assumptions and preferences. These will be a lot harder to change later.
It’s a cliche, but communication is key to a relationship. It’s not enough to act like you’re in a specific kind of relationship with someone; it must be communicated and agreed on by both of you, whether explicitly or implicitly. Again, playing the “ambiguity game” won’t help you much. Women want to know what’s going on. If you don’t make an effort to communicate this somehow, even indirectly, she’ll try to interpret (or end up misinterpreting) what you do communicate and you may well end up with differing ideas about where your relationship is going. Do I need to tell you that this is a bad idea?
The six major relationship types, how to analyze each of the relationship types from the standpoint of what it’s really like (pluses and minuses), how to get there, and how to make sure it succeeds are covered in the Relationship Management DVD.
It’s Sunday afternoon. You met a great woman on Friday or Saturday night. You opened, you created attraction, you qualified, and then you started to build comfort. The situation wasn’t right for you to take it further, so you casually invited her to join you for some exciting event on Monday. She gave you her number. You phone. It rings a few times and goes to her voicemail. You leave a message. She doesn’t call you back. It’s now Tuesday. What do you do?
1. Maybe call her again next week, but that’s it. You need to have the frame that you have lots of women interested in you and are busy, or else she won’t stay attracted to you anyway.
2. Call or text every day or two with a variety of different approaches, to see if any of them make an impact. Delete the number after a few weeks if you don’t get anywhere.
3. Call every day until she answers. Once in a while call three times in a row to see if that works. After a week or so, drop back to once a week or so. Don’t give up until YOU are no longer interested.
What’s the right answer? Don’t look ahead…
Actually, any of them could be the right answer. In the right context, all of these are okay. Too many beginners are too inflexible with the frame that “I have value… she has to come to me” and default to (1). Yes, this is a good frame, and it’s important. However, sometimes you need to do a little bit of pursuing as well.
Why is this? If you obviously have value, why should you have to pursue a woman? Why does she want you to? In short, it’s because this shows that you are genuinely interested in her. In fact, the more value you have, or appear to have, the more a woman will want to see you put in a bit of genuine effort to pursue her. She recognizes that you can have easy conquests, and she doesn’t want to be easy.
Why else? Some women are simply flaky and scatterbrained (so are some men). She may adore you, but you called when she was having dinner, and then she met up with a friend, and now it’s the next day, and she could call you, but now she’s distracted and, anyway, if you’re really interested in her you’ll call again, right?
Why else? She wants to play the traditional female role of being chased. It’s exciting for her, and built into millennia of social programming. It’s not a great frame for men to be in, which is why we short-circuit it when we first meet a woman by disqualifying ourselves during the attraction phase. That’s easy in public, where you can plausibly start a random conversation with an attractive woman without being interested in her (until she wins you over, of course…). It’s not easy on the phone. By calling, you are confirming your interest. That’s why it’s so important to qualify her when you first meet, so she feels comfortable with your interest in her, but it does mean that you might feel a little bit of “back to square one” on the telephone. So, yes, she may make you work for it by not returning your phone call. Don’t take it personally.
Why else? Some women are taught “not to call guys.” Yes, it’s pretty silly, but there is just as much silly dating advice for women as there is for men. There’s nothing you can do about this. Call them. You can fix their silly ideas later.
Now, we covered ages ago some of the crucial tactics for making sure that she does answer the phone when you call (programming your number into her phone, telling her when you’re going to call, planning a specific event, making her verbalize some anti-flake routines, texting/calling that night, etc.) as well as how to leave a message (leave hooks, cut yourself off, etc.) so we’ll assume that you’ve done all of this, and are still not getting her on the phone. You can give up, of course, and focus your energies on new women. This is totally fine. But you can also set aside a few minutes a day with your “cold” phone numbers and do some of this:
· Vary the time of day when you call. Morning, afternoon, evening, night. If you’re getting nowhere, try calling at 1am. You’ll wake her up, so make sure you can be immediately entertaining from the second she answers. (Start with a high-energy, funny, short routine. Don’t even introduce yourself.)
· Call from different numbers.
· Try sending text messages – some people simply prefer these to phone calls.
· Don’t ever acknowledge that you are calling and she isn’t returning your calls. Adopt the frame – to yourself – that she is just a flaky woman and it’s kind of cute. Don’t let it cross your mind that she might not actually be interested in you.
· Don’t ever say “this is the last time I’m calling” or “I’m calling to leave you another message” – see above. And if you do get her on the phone, don’t even bring up the subject of your previous calls or texts.
· If you phone, and it goes directly to voicemail (and doesn’t ring at all), hang up. You got a free pass. If it doesn’t ring, it won’t show up as a missed call on her phone. She won’t see that you called. If it does ring, leave a message.
On the other hand, don’t turn “pursuing” into “chasing.” If she tells you not to call, stop calling. Don’t be creepy.
If you are new to meeting women and dating, check out the seduction bible for meeting and attracting women called Magic Bullets.
You see an attractive woman. You don’t know her. You have no “excuse” to talk to her. Can you walk up to her and start a conversation – the kind of conversation that’s going to lead to attraction and more?
This is a skill any man can master. And one no man can afford to ignore – if you can’t comfortably talk to strangers, you’ve excluded 99.9% of the women whose path you’re going to cross in life.
So if you’re not approaching SUCCESSFULLY and CONSISTENTLY, take a look at this list. Print it out and keep it with you. Master these and your life WILL change.
1. Do “warm up sets” before you get to the bar/club/party/park. Somewhere nearby, do a few approaches that “don’t count” until you’re in a talkative, social state of mind. The world’s best pick up artists do this.
2. Be “social” not a “shark.” The guy who walks into a bar, circles around a few times, and then gets the courage to approach women one by one is going home alone. Women KNOW this type. Talk socially to everyone and have fun – you’re not a starving hunter desperate for a meal.
3. Smile. That one’s easy.
4. Have a couple of “go-to” openers – things you can say to start a conversation that you KNOW will work. You don’t need 50, 500, or 5000. 3 or 4 is just fine. Pick a couple you like from the Love Systems Routines Manual – it’s 200 pages of guaranteed “things to say” from approaching to seduction that actual top pickup artists use in their personal life.
5. Approach right away. Once she notices you looking (she will — women have eyes in the back of their head), you’re either going to be “confident” or “creepy,” so be confident and approach. More advanced guys can play the eye contact game, but if you’re having trouble successfully starting a conversation 99% of the time, keep it simple.
6. Use relaxed, confident body language. Get your wingman to watch you and critique. For a complete video course with live examples (including using body language to escalate physically), there’s nothing better than the Beyond Words Home Study Course featuring puas Cajun and Vercetti.
7. It doesn’t matter who she is with. Attractive women rarely do things alone. So get used to the idea that you’re going to have to meet the people she is with at the same time as you meet her. (Day Game is sometimes an exception to this). Whether her friends are male or female, approach anyway. If she’s off-limits, they’ll tell you. We don’t have space to go into this in detail here, but women who have guys in their group are more likely to have a same-night encounter anyway.
8. Eye contact. There’s another easy one. Split it equally among everyone in her group.
9. Project your voice. Put your hand on your chest, just below your pectorals. Experiment with your voice until you can feel vibrations in your hand. That’s the way you want to talk. Be too loud rather than too quiet.
10. Have something to say – you’re going to have to do 90% of the talking at first. Don’t keep talking about whatever your opener was about. When she starts breaking into the conversation, asking your name, where you’re from, what you do for a living – that’s when you know she’s attracted. Content provided by Savoy from Love Systems.
Before you go out
1. The “Game” begins as soon as you leave the house. Women notice you before you approach them. They should always see you having fun, being social, and looking good. (Going out with fun people/good wingmen and to places you like helps with this.)
2. Dress in a way that is fashionable and expresses your identity. Most women see fashion as self-expression. How do you want her to see you? Dress that way. You can’t avoid this – if you dress to blend in, she’ll just think of you as the kind of guy who wants to blend in. There are some great tips and a how-to guide with before and after pictures in the Magic Bullets Handbook.
You see a beautiful woman…
3. Move your feet. If you get the eyes-feet reflex going (i.e., see a hot girl, start walking over to the hot girl), everything else will – eventually – take care of itself. Get this down until it’s automatic. The longer you delay an approach, the harder it will be. Don’t skip this.
4. Memorize five good openers (opening lines) so you always have one ready to go. If you don’t have this, you’ll often stumble on the beginning of the conversation or even talk yourself out of approaching in the first place. If you don’t have a set of good “go-to” openers that you know work, grab some from the Routines Manual. Or create your own.
The first few seconds…
5. Body language – this is a massive topic and great body language can almost pick up a girl all by itself. Fundamentals for the first few minutes include eye contact, shoulders back and relaxed, hands calm and not in your pockets, standing up straight (don’t fidget), head straight (not tilted). Stand like you would if you owned the world. The techniques for having the right body language are explained in dept in the Beyond Words Home Study Course.
6. Speak up! Most men speak too softly when approaching women. Especially at bars and clubs, she must hear you clearly the first time and it must cut across other conversations, the music, etc. Also, use your “chest voice” (Google it) and not your “head voice.”
7. Don’t “milk” the opener. Whatever you said when you came over to talk to her, switch off that topic after a minute. That’s crucial. You want her to see you as an attractive, interesting man, not as “the guy I talked to about such-and-such.”
Getting into the conversation…
8. Be FUN. Don’t be too serious or take yourself or the conversation too seriously. If you look like you’re having fun and enjoying yourself, she will have fun too. Fun is contagious…
9. … but don’t be a dancing monkey. You’re not trying to become her personal clown or court jester. Have fun and be fun, but don’t try to entertain.
10. Some things that are great for attraction and are also fun include storytelling, teasing, and role plays. It’s okay if you prefer one or two of these – each of these techniques has its own skill set. Go with what works for you.
11. Avoid “interviews.” Don’t ask her too many questions. A question or two shows some interest in who she is as a person, but more than that is what every guy does; it’s boring and a turnoff. It’s also a waste – asking her a question about herself does nothing to attract her or let her get to know your good qualities. Instead, make statements. E.g., instead of asking where she’s from, make a guess. Or tell her where you’re from and she’ll do the same.
12. Similarly, don’t play tourist in her life. So you find out she’s a stewardess/porn star/nuclear scientist and you’re curious to know more. Save it. If she’s attracted to you, you’ll have all the time in the world to ask whatever you want.
13. NEVER leave a conversation because you “run out of things to say.” Force yourself to stay. Your brain will learn, if it is forced to, how to improvise. Or use one of the hundreds of proven “things to say” (called routines) in the Routines Manual. Be strict with yourself on this.
Making attraction STICK
Some guys think of attraction as something that takes a long time but once you got it, it’s permanent. That’s doubly wrong. Women feel attracted to men all the time, and it doesn’t take long – within minutes of beginning a conversation. But if you don’t do anything to solidify or lock in that attraction, it goes away as quickly as it came.
14. Qualification is the best way to keep her attracted. By making her work a bit for you and by leading the conversation to a place where you and her admit that you are interested in each other, you’re not some fleeting guy… you’re a guy she needs more of.
15. Phone numbers are not attraction. Getting a phone number does not mean she is attracted to you. Getting a phone number before she is attracted to you is next to useless. Read the Ultimate Guide to Text and Phone Game if you’re a phone number + dates guy instead of a One Night Stand guy.
Obviously, this is only scratching the surface. Attraction takes up several chapters of the Magic Bullets Handbook, most of the routines in the Routines Manual are attraction routines, and the interview series goes through the nuts and bolts of a bunch of attraction techniques so you can go over “how to” do them all. But nothing about attraction will ever contradict these 15 Laws, no matter how advanced you are.
If you ever break any of these 15, print out the list, carry it in your wallet, and review them until they are instinctive and you don’t even need to think about them anymore. Content provided by Savoy from Love Systems.